Right now, I really must be focused. When this posts on Friday, I will be in Houston, waiting to board British Airways to head across the ocean. But less than 24 hours before leaving, I am sitting here fighting panic at everything left to do before we leave. I should have realized this weeks ago, but packing for a month’s absence is a bit more complicated than being gone for a week. A no-brainer, right?

Usually my To-Do lists are orderly, with little check boxes beside each item. I have tasks in all areas: writing, fitness, family, food choices, and other areas that I like to track.

NOT TODAY!

I gave up earlier this week on having orderly to-do lists because I had too many items every day to fit into my normal planner. No problem, I thought. I’ll just systematically and calmly deal with each item, check it off, and go on to the next one.

Except at the end of each day this week, I had more left to do than I’d hoped for. To honest, I panicked at the amount of extra tasks to do (on top of regular life stuff). So on much of two afternoons, I watched Britbox and Acorn TV instead, dreaming of England without actually making much progress to get there! (Why do we do this? While it felt calming at the time, I actually set myself back even further.)

Calm the PANICKY Brain

So this is my to-do list left for today, with five or six writer things to do before I can start the packing or run to the store for shampoo and all the little travel things you need. Then run some laundry, clean out the refrigerator, and try to figure out how I am going to fit everything I want to take with me into a suitcase and carry-on.

My mind goes TILT-TILT-TILT as I think of packing plenty of warm clothes, hiking boots, books I simply MUST have with me (despite carrying a fully loaded Kindle), those plugs that will enable me to use appliances and my computer without starting a fire, my special foods, and all the rest.

It’s obvious that a third of it will have to stay home. I always choose to take the books, so this trip I may be wearing the same sweater and jeans in every photo taken! Perhaps I’ll go to the nearest village that has an Oxfam store (like our Goodwill) and get a few “gently worn” sweaters.

But what’s the answer to my panic this morning and exchanging it for peace? Taking several really big, deep breaths to calm my racing heart. Closing my eyes and meditating on some truths I know in my heart.

Shifting the Worries to Bigger Shoulders

I’m not the Good Shepherd. I’m not even an assistant shepherd. Instead, I’m like one of these Yorkshire sheep. I’m not in charge, and I’m not doing life alone. He leads me beside the still waters.

All I need to do is pray for help. And keep breathing! And calmly take one task at a time. It will all get done. I’m not alone in this adventure. And what’s more, it will be fun!

See you all on the other side of the pond!